I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
