how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Randomize