i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
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