i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Randomize
