Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
