My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
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