I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
