Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
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