i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
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