you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
