just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
So squirting runs in the family.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Randomize
