I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Randomize
