He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
Randomize
