They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
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