i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
25 People Confess The Biggest Betrayal They Have Ever Faced
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
25 Odd Things These Pathetic People Do For Enjoyment
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.