Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
I think i peed on brittanys purse
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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