So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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