The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize
