There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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