Those balls look pretty dangerous.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
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