The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
She bit a glass in half.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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