when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
