My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
Randomize
