R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
