That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
