I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
I just found a bag of teeth...
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Randomize
