sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
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