dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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