So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
Randomize
