Please, let me fuck your mom
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Man, jail baloney is awful.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
Don't tell me you're on acid again
Randomize