He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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