jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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