You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
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