You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Randomize
