dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Randomize
