oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Panties = found
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
