Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(708): View more from Illinois

you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box

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(507): View more from Minnesota

You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"

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(443): View more from Maryland

yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism

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(425): View more from Washington

Where the royal fuck are you??

(1-425): View more from Washington

The depths of vodka hell.

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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Read it at the TFLN blog
(613): View more from Ontario

He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours

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(816): View more from Missouri

I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress

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(910): View more from North Carolina

Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.

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(309): View more from Illinois

Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.

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(904): View more from Florida

No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.

(386): View more from Florida

Wow

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