Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I'm determined to sit on that face.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
Randomize
