I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
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