you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Randomize
