More tranny stories later!
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
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