don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
Randomize
