Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
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