i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
Randomize
