I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
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