I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
True strength comes from lack of pants
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Randomize