I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016