hotel room ftw
Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
