I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
Randomize