I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
i think i just lost a toe
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
